I apologize gentle readers for my absence from my blog. The heat here has been coma inducing and rendered me barely functional for a while. For you who have been keeping up you will remember my blog rant on the subject of winter. Apparently the only place on the planet where I would be content with the weather is Ecuador... but I digress.
The other day at work I had occasion to tell one of my favorite stories and in the telling knew I wanted to get it down in writing. Webster's defines chivalrous as "marked by gracious courtesy and high-minded consideration esp. to women." In my experience such gentlemen are few and far between and usually their life experiences have shaped and defined their gallant natures. But there must be a rare few who are born with this noble attribute. Cynical though I can be about the menfolk in general, I have to believe it because I am blessed to know one such rare young man.
This story begins with two children meeting in pre-school. My youngest daughter (YD) and the young man (YM) of whom I write. They formed a friendship and have remained friends to this very day. It started so long ago I cannot tell you when, but YM is also known as my "Saturday son" because he has spent most of his Saturdays with us for years. My daughter was attending our town's public school at the time as was YM but I was searching for an alternative due to her learning disabilities. As she was finishing 4th grade a new school opened for kids like her, so at that point she left the school YM was still attending and the public school system for good.
One Saturday as I was picking up YM to come to our house for his visit he asked me a question. He was a bit troubled by YD's new school which had about 8 students total and was meant to be a school that covered 1st grade to high school if all went well. Keep in mind that this is a boy entering the 5th grade I am talking about. He said he had been thinking about YD's new school and figured that since it was so small they would never hold a prom. He looked me in the eye and promised me that when he got to high school he would take my daughter to his prom because he thought that every girl should have that experience.
I was certainly surprised and impressed, but being the cynic I am I suspect I was thinking something along the lines of, "Isn't that sweet, but time will change all that." I told YM that was a lovely promise, but we should keep it just between us. I told him a lot can happen between 5th grade and 11th so we shouldn't speak of it to my daughter.
The years went by and the topic had not been raised again until another Saturday when once again I was bringing YM over to my house for his customary visit. He asked me if I realized that he was starting his junior year in high school and informed me that he absolutely intended to ask my daughter to his prom in the spring. I was stunned that he had carried that promise in his heart all those years, but still skeptical enough to tell him again that a lot could happen between fall and prom time so I didn't want him to mention it to my daughter yet. He agreed to keep it between us but assured me that even if he had a girlfriend at the time he would still take YD. Not likely I thought ( what girlfriend would stand by for that after all, even if he intended to keep his vow).
But Spring came and on a Saturday morning while I was at work and my daughter was away from home for the day YM called me and asked my permission to go over to my house and "do something." I am an easygoing gal about my house and trusted this young man totally so permission was granted.
A wee digression is required here so you can understand the layout of my house a bit as I will be trying to convey a visual moment in a sec. We enter the house through the basement and as you come up the stairs the first thing you would see straight ahead of you is the far wall of our living room. The room has a cathedral ceiling so that's a lot of wall. YM had covered said wall and most of the rest of the wall space in the living room with glow in the dark stars. When I say covered I am not exaggerating. He must have put up 200-300 stars from floor level to second story ceiling height. The stars were of various sizes and underneath a large one at eye level he had tucked a note asking my daughter to the prom. I gotta confess here that I have tears in my eyes as I write this so you can imagine how it affected me then. My daughter was thrilled and stunned beyond belief when she came home to say the least. ( Three years later the stars and note are still up on the walls by the way. Neither my daughter nor I wish to remove them.)
You need to understand that they were not romantic about each other, just very good friends. Asking her to the prom would have been more than enough, but YM went all out. He spent his very hard earned money in buckets to rent a tux, buy flowers, the works . No girlfriend could have asked for more ( My older daughter who went with her boyfriend of 4 years at the time got far less. He spent the whole evening mocking just about everything and pretty much managed to spoil it for her).
YM gave my daughter the prom experience every girl dreams about but few realize. She was Cinderella at the Ball that night as none of her former classmates from the 4th grade recognized her and everyone was dismayed when they discovered the beauty with YM was the kid who had left their school all those years ago.
But one fine young man,"marked by gracious courtesy and high-minded consideration esp. to women", has been there from the beginning for her, a loyal and true friend. He didn't just give her a wonderful night. He gave her a lifelong memory she will treasure forever. He gave it to me too.
Here is what I think. Other than one's children, friends are life's greatest gift and blessing. Make sure you treasure yours. Mine mean the world to me and I try to let them know by action and word whenever I can.
