eHarmony and me... Part 2

5/12/10

OK...we all knew this was inevitable given my curiosity issues. I googled eHarmony promo codes, found a sweet deal for a 3 month membership and gave myself a Mother's Day present.

One of the benefits of being a paying member... I can see pictures of the guys if they have posted any. This is not of major importance to me as I have always believed it's what's inside that counts. But seeing these guys has been interesting.

One of them looks so much like a friend I have known and loved forever that it took my breath away. I don't think this guy and I are a match, but part of me just wants to write him about the odd coincidence of his looks and wish him good luck in his search.

As I read their "profiles" I feel daunted by what I perceive to be their expectations. An air of seriousness hangs over their words, even their joking. I get the feeling that many of them are hoping for a lot more than I am. For instance, given the age range I chose to fish in ( 58-65 ), a lot of these guys have grandkids they profess to love and adore. That's as it should be, don't get me wrong, but would I have to love and adore his grandkids too?? I'm just getting the feeling that they want their match to be on board for all their interests and that isn't gonna be me. Another example... a lot of them like to bicycle or ski or climb ( as opposed to easy hiking, something I would be up for), and , again, I think that's great...for them. Now if they want to do all that on their own or with other friends and then come see me that would be cool, but I feel they are looking for an all purpose companion.

I've been "archiving" a lot of great sounding guys ( I have been sent over 40 matches already! ) for reasons like those stated above, but I could be overreacting. At some point I'll have to communicate with a couple of them. At the moment I have adopted a passive stance to see if any of them will make a first move, but my patience probably won't last a week.

What I want is a man who will become a deep meaningful friend. I want companionship but not 24/7. I want it to be about  "US" not about me fitting into his world ( meeting his family and friends, etc.) or he into mine. If things eventually led to our worlds merging then so be it, but that is not even a goal for me. I have always been more of a one on  one person. I have more than enough wonderful friends ( just no male ones close by as mentioned in a previous post), and I rarely choose to experience more than two of them together at a time. I like to focus on who I am with and want them to focus on me as well.

I am not looking to remarry, nor is the physical aspect of a relationship a priority for me at this moment.This being said, I rule nothing out and am open to whatever may develop over time . At this point I just want to have fun! It remains to be seen if it can be found on eHarmony.

To Be Continued...